It's Over Now

We put my Mom in the ground on Saturday. I was a mess at the Funeral. Not only having to deal with seeing people and being as social as I could, but having to say goodbye to my Mom and seeing her lay in the casket was tough. I cried or fought tears most all the way through the service. I was glad to see some old friends and family members show up and even my Dad and his wife came to pay their last respects. Everyone was nice and very supportive. My colleagues here at BCHS and my students here have been understanding and supportive as well. The college is going to establish a memorial in my Mom's name to help in the fight against cancer. The pastor for the service had known my Mom since he was 5 or 6 and had been the pastor she turned to recently to accept Jesus has her savior. I seem to recall that my Mom had been baptized years and years ago, as was I, and over the years had gotten away from Christ, but did come back. The Pastor did a great job of capturing the essence of Dotty Gearheart Duncan and shared some wonderful stories and scriptures with us. My brother (4 yrs younger), really did a great job of organizing all this in a short period of time. He not only got the ambulance to take her to the hospital last Tue., but made the decision to remove the respirator and comforted her in her final moments, then had to arrange to get her back home and all the rest. He really did a stand up job and I am very grateful and proud of him.

There is a great void in my life now and I will always miss my Mom. She always had my back, no matter how badly I screwed up, and I felt comfort in knowing I could turn to her anytime of the day or night. My Dad is alright, but I have never felt comfortable turning to him in a time of need, as I did with my Mom. Can't explain that, but it's how I always felt. He has helped me a bit over the years and I am sure he would do all he could if I got in trouble. The best part of this ordeal is that I have gotten close to my brother again. We had kind of grown apart over the years, after having been as close as any two brothers could all our lives. He kids had never met my wife and daughter and my wife and daughter had never met my aunts, uncles and cousins. My brother had us all over to his house (spread really) after the burial and we ate, drank and talked well into the night.

It is done now, over and my Mom is with the Lord and at peace. No pain, worries or sorrows can bother her now. If you are still watching and listening Mom, I love you deeply and miss you greatly. I will try to live the rest of my life as you would expect me to and still try to make you proud of me. Thanks for all you did, for all your love and support. goodbye...